My Work


The original blog post needed extensive edits. Unlike the original, the revision includes a headline with one big idea, an attention getting lead, an improved structure that smoothly leads the reader from one point to the next, techniques such as clear sub-headlines, and corrections to sentence structure. Mixed metaphors and metaphors that did not work were modified or removed. Overall, the text is tighter and the message more focused.

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Click image to download the full original version